Saturday, November 28, 2009

Write, read, edit, repeat. When the cycle ends.

I've been doing the write, read, edit, repeat waltz for so long I never thought to see the end of a project, let alone two.

But here I stand. Safe Harbor was first to launch and I must admit to feeling a little ill at first. My baby, out in the cold, cruel world. Hey, there's a bit I should fix. Can a manuscript ever be clean enough? Pried from my fingers it's in print.

Now Escape to Love is in the chute on its way to print. The editing witch has pin pointed half a dozen things that maybe would be better this way or that. She's talking to the wind. Until the proof copy comes there is little to be done.

So here I find myself standing on the ledge of, gasp, promotion. Have I mentioned I'm afraid of heights?
Believe it or not, I'm something of a recluse, perfectly content to type away and let someone else deal with promotion. Scared? Who me? You bet your life I am.

Is it that I don't believe my work is solid? I know that it is.

Don't want the world to see it?
Nothing could be further from the truth. If I had the money I'd hand my books out for people to read and enjoy. I love them so much, I want you to love them too.

Afraid of criticism? Not really. I don't like every well-written book I pick up. So it stands to reason, as improbable as it seems, not everyone is going to get or like my work.  Having run the gauntlet of on line contests and reveiw by my most wonderful writing group (The Writin' Wombats) I've developed a pretty thick skin.

When it comes to blowing my own horn, selling myself as the next great up and comer, a voice nags at me.  I was raised with Midwest values and work ethic. Do your job. Do it well. Don't brag. Doing a good job is reward enough. Okay, that's leaves me hanging in a precarious position.

I wish I had a touch of my friend, Judi Fennell's enthusiasm. She's gone all out with her Mer-series beginning with In Over Her Head.  She's a real people person and it shows. The woman glows and then she smiles and everyone in the room is happier just for being there.

Pat Bertram has been an example of sheer force of will. More Deaths Than One launched her and I don't  think she's slowed down enough to notice a door might have been closed.

I mention and envy these two, because I'm shy. Not painfully so, but in new situations it's close. This is a new situation.  I'm inherently not a joiner, which in this business is a liability.  My watch and see M.O. won't serve me in this model.  So here I stand, wondering if I should take a leap of faith, or slide off the ledge from a seated position?

How do you go about breaking through into new situations?  How do you face your fears?